Tidy desks are something we should all strive for. But some civil servants are finding that this mission can go too far. In a pilot study at Longbenton, Tyneside, black tape has been put on civil servants’ desks to show where pens go. The Public and Commercial Services (PCS) union claimed the scheme was costing £7.4m nationally and branded it “demeaning”. HM Revenue and Customs said it was in line with workstation training. The customs spokesman said: “Part of the Lean programme is to clear the workplace and only keep essential items to hand.”

But a PCS spokesman said: “We had a situation where staff were asked ‘Is that banana on your desk active or inactive?’, meaning were they going to eat it? If not, it had to be cleared away.”