“Skywalker, there is no ‘try’, there is only ‘do’ or ‘not do’.” – Yoda, Star Wars

The Jedi master was addressing his student who was not raising a damaged space craft with the force, proclaiming “I’m trying!”

So this invites you to be more precise with your language. After all, when a colleague tells you they’ll try to get your work done by Friday, your expectation drops — you know it’s not going to happen.

I wonder how often you allow “try” to slip into your speech? “Attempt”, “hopefully” and similar words are just “try” in posh clothes.

Clean up your act and commit to what you plan to happen and say no to that which you won’t be able to deliver. What happens then is that people get clear about you – you become more trusted because you say you’re going to deliver and do. When you say ‘No’, they respect that.

“Don’t think about anything blue”. What happens? You think about blue before you can unthink about blue. So negation in your communication works the opposite way to the way you planned it.

Listen to parents of small children in supermarkets. “Don’t drop that bottle!” What does the child hear?

Instead, structure your requests in positive language – “put the bottle down carefully”. Now the child has somewhere to go with their behaviour.

For homework this month, look out for public notices written in negation. ‘Don’t Drive Tired’ is often on motorway signs.

The more you notice them, the more you’ll clean up your own language and become much more influential.

Ed Percival is a business coach with Shirlaws Business Coaching www.shirlawscoaching.com