Taking control of your BMW

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 | By Ed Percival

Whose fault? or that’s my responsibility. With the world in a horrible place and the economy in bits, it’s sometimes very easy to look for blame for the situation you’re in.

The daily papers are really good at telling us what we should be bothered by and worried about. Even without their analysis, in the office we can find fault. It’s the government, the company we work for, the client, the candidate, a colleague.

What happens to you when you point the finger this way?

Remember the last conversation you were in when a colleague was blaming her lack of results on her client and the candidates she was trying to place. When the conversation ended, how was your energy? Did you walk away truly motivated and ready to conquer the world?

No, I thought not. So you know that blaming drains energy. If you’re the one telling the story, you’re probably draining yourself and whoever is listening.

Now, I accept that we all have a need to have a decent BMW session from time to time [that’s Bitch, Moan and Whine]. A little of getting the dirty water off our chest is probably helpful.

Does it go on longer than necessary?

How would it be if you became conscious of your action and stopped when you begin to notice when the energy of others is draining.

I think the trick is to flip the conversation and begin to turn the content to something that you’re doing where you’re taking more responsibility .

A demonstration of your taking control is very empowering for you.

I think you’ll find your audience at the coffee machine will walk away energised by your leadership by small example.

Your choice.

Ed Percival is a business coach with Shirlaws in Thames Valley. His heritage is in coaching for impact.